Prison Break South Africa- A fairytale

I think it would be appropriate to begin this article- Once upon a time. You see, this is a story about miracles and would it not be real, would be, too fantastic to be a fairy tale.

Well, once a time there was a chap, let's call him Schabir Shaik. Now, Schabir was your usual dishonest guy, who, like many, accumulated millions from dodgy deals and dishonest relationships. He lived the good life, with his equally honest brothers. The Shaik's had contacts in high places and many friend in political circles.

Now like any good tale, this one has twists and turns.

It so happened the sheriff, going by the name of the Scorpions and the National Prosecuting Authority caught up to Schabir's wrong doings and in an unfortunate turn of events, our poor Schabir was sentenced to 15 years in the dungeon for fraud and corruption. (One name was mentioned in conjunction with his during the judgment- that of another colourful fantasy character- Jacob Zuma. This however, is another long, but amusing story on it's own. )

Behind bars for a short while, our hero suddenly developed chronic hypertention, causing him to be confined (used very loosley here) to his prison hospital ward. Due to his terrible affliction, he was allowed to have visitors and ate good food (and wine it has been reported)-unlike the other prison inmates, who had to sit and rot and eat slop.

Yes, Mr Shaik played the system like Slash plays a guitar. Brilliantly.

But after spending 28 months as a guest under the correctional services, (one cannot say 'jail', as that would imply he was actually in jail) he submitted an application for medical parole. Of course, despite everybody protesting, screaming and objecting, our hero was granted medical parole as he was so gravely ill, each breath could have been his last..

(Section 79 of the correctional svc act of 1998 tell us medical parole should only be granted to people in the 'final stages of a terminal illness'-it seems HIV/Aids does not count as very few people are granted this rare gift)

Shame, Mr Shaik was allowed to go home and enjoy his last couple of days or weeks with his shady family. This was the least the system could do to somebody who gave so much of himself (and his wealth) to politics.
(Prior to his release, he even got a hefty payment, being the interest from the fortune that had been confiscated from him due to it being gained under questionable means-it just got better for our hero)

Now in the modern times, we often overlook divine deeds and miracles- but it happened. Schabir, whom we all know was 'knock knock knocking on heaven's (or probably hell's) door' made a miracle recovery.
He was reported to have been seen at his wife's birthday party in an expensive restaurant, seen driving round in his luxury (nothing is too good for our hero) car, and even reported to have been seen playing a round of golf. (Sightings almost reached that of Elvis and Nessie proportions).
He was alive and seemingly pretty well. Now, either this was a modern day miracle, or somebody has really tried to fool us...

The breaking news now is that our Schabir Shaik apparently applied for a Presidential Pardon in May 2008, when Mbeki was President. The application was lost in the system (of course) and now, that we have a new president, has found it's way to the presidency. Great timing I say.

The presidency in turn have stated that (this is really good) they will handle the application 'like any other pardon'. Seriously- they expect us to swallow this. Mr Shaik's luck, like his improvement in health, is on the up. The very person that was implicated with him in fraud and corruption, Mr Zuma, is now the President. (Mr Z is also a wonderful player of the system-probably better than Shaik, as he appointed the right people to the right positions to get his charges dropped- once again-brillaint)

Now it is up to Jacob Zuma to grant or not grant the pardon.

I think it would be safe to say that our hero, Schabir, will be granted the pardon (to all of our surprise), and he and his brothers and his friends, will live happlily ever, after making more and more money from great business deals.