Daft Crimes and Criminals

Thought as it is a wet Friday here, I would have a bit of fun and try to reintroduce the Stupid Crimes and Criminals Friday tradition.

To begin we have a real winner. Mr Albert Bailey, a twenty seven year old Connecticut resident, who is apparently starved for patience. When he decided he need to make an illegal bank withdrawal, he was not interested in waiting and decided to do what no one has been clever enough to do before- he phoned the bank prior to arriving. Sparky considerately informed them that he planned on robbing them and would be very grateful if they would have the money available on arrival.

Of course, the bank, not being as daft, called the cops who apprehended Bailey and an unnamed sixteen year old accomplice. The police, having a sense of humour it seems, did wait for the dye trap to explode first though.
Our understatement of the week comes from Police Sergeant James Perez when he indicated that the two suspects weren't 'to bright'...really?

Secondly we have Anthony Miranda. This 24 year old no- gooder decided to mug an unnamed guy on the South West side of Chicago. The result was that Anthony ended up with two blue eyes, facial cuts and a gunshot to his ankle. Turns out the target was a martial arts and ultimate fighting champion.
During the hold up, the Victim made his move. During the tussle Albert's gun discharged and shot him in the ankle in addition to being beaten silly.  
He is being held on $350 000 bond for this and various other charges.

Lastly we have Mark Fiasco and Mathew Hawley. These chaps were pulled over in a routine traffic stop by deputies in Florida. Cops became suspicious when the address given did not match that on Fiasco's licence. While conducting a car search they found 29.3 grams of marijuana in the boot (trunk)  of his car along with a bong, inside a plastic bag.

Fiasco and Hawley, happily  agreed to purchasing the magic herb with an intent to 'smoke the shit out of it'.
Over and above this, the pot head twosome gratefully thanked the deputies for finding the bong, which they has not seen for seven years, after purchasing it for $150. Got to love grateful people.